What can be more overwhelming than bringing a new baby into your life?

Having a new baby is exhausting, anxiety inducing and likely more stressful than anything you have ever experienced. You leave the hospital with a new being that fills you with joy and love but does not come with an instruction manual nor words to tell you what she or he needs. You might be feeling significant pain from the delivery and are still processing the birth itself.  Breastfeeding might be presenting challenges as you work on getting baby latched well and learn together. And what about the lack of sleep!!

The quote, “It was the best of times, it was the worst of times” could have been made 
by any number of new mothers.

Who would not find this time in their lives overwhelming!! Experiencing anxiety, low mood and sadness (often called the “baby blues”) is normal. Upwards of 80% of new mothers experience these so-called blues in the first days of having a baby. Between 10 and 20% of new mothers may actually experience depressive symptoms and fit the diagnostic criteria for a post partum mood disorder (PPMD) soon after delivery or even some months after baby is born.

So what can you do to get through?

Sleep when baby sleeps. Lack of sleep is a given when you have a new baby – but sleep is so important for your emotional health.  Rest whenever the opportunity presents itself. Cleaning the house, entertaining guests and doing the dishes will wait! When friends ask, “Is there anything I can do?” say “yes!!” and have them cook, clean, take the dog out – whatever needs to be done. If friends are not offering, ask them to help or tell friends and family that you are not ready for visitors yet.  

Find support. Find like-minded women and share your thoughts and experiences. Let those you are comfortable with know how you are feeling. Be honest with your partner and family. Let them know how they can help.  If breastfeeding is not going well, seek out help (see local resources). 

Don’t look too far ahead. Take a moment at a time, the challenges you are facing today will be different next week. Monitor your thoughts for negative, pessimistic ruminations.  

Know that you are not alone. Most new mothers go through overwhelming periods in those first weeks and beyond. Talk to those around you and share your experiences.

If you are becoming desperate get help! Take this quiz, you may be experiencing a treatable post partum mood disorder. This is nothing to be ashamed of or embarrassed about.  

 

Check out the links below for more information and support

Postpartum Wakeup Call - A great You Tube video describing postpartum depression

Our Sisters Place - Lists support groups and resources for women with PPMD in the GTA and Ontario

Mother Reach - Tips for mothers, fathers and other family members on dealing with PPMD

Depression and Breastfeeding - Useful scientific information on PPMD

Post Natal Depression - a nice UK site with info on PPMD

Online PPMD support group

Postpartum Psychiatric Disorders